who we are

there's lots of factors that determine who we are, and what we turn out to be like. for the purposes of this piece i'm only going to refer to personality as the focal point when i ask 'who are you?'

the environment we grow up in.. parent(s), siblings, other relatives and friends.. economic situations determine the way you turn out as well. role models you look up to and try to model your life upon. things you see, things you read.. and sometimes you just do things because it looks so damn cool! yes don't deny it, we've all been there.

then there's a whole different aspect of relationships and how they effect/affect you, and often i've wondered what the age of reason has to do with that. some people get into romantic (sort of) relationships as soon as they hit their teens - whether they bounce in and out of those dalliances or they find their one mate and hang on for dear life, these formative years definitely mold your future adult personality. in the same vein there are folks who have not even dated before they can legally drive, and they come into relationships eventually, with a whole set of expectations.

Age of Reason - The name given to that period of human life at which persons are deemed to begin to be morally responsible. This, as a rule, happens at the age of seven, or thereabouts, though the use of reason requisite for moral discernment may come before, or may be delayed until notably after, that time.

i have always believed in this concept of age of reason, and that the final person who we turn out to be is heavily determined by how and when we come upon the age of reason.

then recently, i got thinking about another concept too. do we give ourselves enough credit for the people we choose to fall in love with and (happily!) live ever after with? how much of a personality change are we willing to accept so as to be with someone? people say that there has to be equal amounts of sacrifice for a relationship to be healthy - that means sometimes one of the pair has to step up and take the lead, and other times it's the other person. but how often do we see life falling into a rut where it's one person doing all the legwork, so to speak.

this post does not have any answers for you.. but it might have a few questions you have not asked yourself for a while. ruminate on them awhile as you enjoy your weekend.. let's hear what you think.

Reference -
Delany, J. (1907). Age of Reason. The Catholic Encyclopedia, Vol 1. New York: Robert Appleton Company. Retrieved August 30, 2008 from New Advent: http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/01209a.htm